Interview With Counsellor Lucy Cavendish

How and/or why did you become a therapist?

I was a journalist and I loved interviewing people and finding out what makes them tick and I realised that I wanted to do that in a more in-depth way. I am fascinated by people, their world, our world.

What are the most rewarding aspects of being a therapist?

It’s wonderful to build up a trusting relationships with someone. When I feel a shift, it makes me love what I do – what ‘we’ do in the room together. I learn a tremendous amount from my clients. Everyone brings something new and different in to the therapy room.

What’s unique or special in your background or approach to interpersonal relationships?

I don’t feel I am unique! Everything has gone before me and will continue after me. I am just a small tiny cog in a much larger wheel of psychological process. It would worry me if I thought there was something special in my approach. I try to do the best job I can do in a ethically responsible way…

What are your favorite or most interesting interpersonal relationship tips/advice?

Go in to every session as if it is new – it is necessary to be present but don’t beat yourself up if you drift off. Be curious. Be aware that we know nothing about this other person. We need to start joining up dots but be very careful when you do this. EG. My alcoholic father is not my client’s alcoholic father. Be aware of the many presumptions we make especially when circumstances bear an uncanny resemblance to our own.

What are some things about therapy that you want to increase public awareness about?

People still think it is something to be ashamed about – it isn’t. I’d have everyone in therapy for a few session sif it was possible! Or affordable. But I’m amazed how much people will spend on themselves but not when it comes to therapy which, for me, is one of the most effective way of supporting someone and heralding in the possibility of change.

What are some of the biggest mistakes a therapist or patient can make?

No such things as mistakes when it comes to the client, just ruptures that need to be worked through.


Learn more about Lucy Cavendish at

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