How to get over girlfriend’s past

• If a man feels uncomfortable with his girlfriend’s past, what can be done to help him overcome them?

Delee D’Arcy, LPC, LMFT:

Say your feelings. Spoken feelings (mad, sad, glad, scared or distrusting) vs facts/beliefs are clearer. You cannot argue feelings. Realize that we all have a past. If her past goes against your values or morals, ask yourself if she is different now. How old was she when she had her ‘past’? None of us reach our full maturity until we 25-30. It took courage for her to be vulnerable with you. Be specific about what she can do to raise your trust. She may, or may not, be able to do that for you. Notice when she does the things that help you gain trust and let her know you appreciate the effort.

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