Why is my husband so selfish to me? This question is one that is not new to the ears of relationship experts and marriage counselors. When a spouse gets to the point where they have to ask this question, then you can tell how strained their relationship already is. Sometimes, these traits are obvious before marriage but we hope that can change them, other times there is absolutely no sign that the person you’re marrying will turn on you. Whatever the case may be, no one deserves to feel like they are in a marriage alone. If you’re caught in this position, then you need to understand why he is that way and how you want to deal with the answers you find. In this post, we’ll talk about some reasons why your husband is acting selfish towards you.
- He’s gotten used to you. Sometimes with spend a lot of time together (like in a marriage), there is a tendency for one of them to get so used to the other that they don’t make any efforts anymore. To him, he’s now so familiar with you that he doesn’t need to impress you anymore so he does whatever he wants to do. If you don’t speak and tell him how his selfishness is affecting you and your marriage, he may just go on thinking that he is doing absolutely nothing wrong.
- He expects you to understand. As relationships progress and people become older, they take on more responsibilities and their lives become harder to an extent. Given these circumstances, it is very easy for one partner to forget about the other’s needs with the hopes that they can see what they’re going through and understand. While this does not entirely make him a bad person, it assumes that your partner can read your minds and your feelings per time which is a ludicrous concept. So don’t chuck up your partner’s needs to, “Oh she can see that I’m trying to work on my life and my dreams, she should understand”. For husbands like this, speak to him and let him understand that he needs to let you in. Let him know how hurt you are and try to work it out with him. If he still cares about you, he will listen and make amends.
- You’ve always been the one to make sacrifices. If you’ve always been the one to bend over in the relationship, or you’ve been the one who has always had to give up their life or comfort for the relationship to work, you will end up with a husband who believes he can do as he pleases and still have his relationship intact. In this case, your husband will always feel like no matter how selfish his actions are towards you, you will eventually adjust and the balance would be restored in your marriage. If this is your relationship, then you need to rise up and make new rules. Make it clear that going forward, you intend to choose yourself every now and then and as you do this, keep your word. With time and a husband who loves you and is willing to work on your relationship, you should begin to see positive changes in no time.