Taking a break in a relationship: rules?

Breaks are necessary in relationships for several reasons: to find one’s self and evaluate the state of the relationship amongst others. Thus, breaks in relationships are strategic and purposeful. As such, some ground rules should be laid down when a couple decide to take a break from a relationship.

The rules are important to ensure that the break serves its purpose and that the best decisions are made after the break. Here are some ground rules which have been established for couples taking a break from their relationship.

Discuss the need for the break

Couples do not just randomly go on breaks. They carefully consider the option of taking a break and then act on it. The relationship may still be going great, but both parties know that they’ve lost a part of their initial connection and want to take some time off to find themselves and probably become better lovers. Thus, it is important to discuss the need of the break instead of just ghosting each other. It is also important to do this discussion in person as other virtual forms of communication may lead to lose of the essence of the discussion.

Discuss the situation of things explicitly

A lot of things tend to be left unsaid in moments such as when couples are deciding whether they should go on a break. The unsaid portions of the discussion typically include the bulk and most important parts of the discussion.

If things are going to be left unsaid when deciding whether to go on breaks and the terms and conditions of the break, more damage will be caused. Thus, both parties have to be committed to explicitly discussing how they currently feel and what they hope to achieve with the break.

Establish communication rules during the break

A break should be an actual break or it will lose its essence. Thus, it is important for both parties to agree to specific rules as per communication to achieve the goals of the break. As hard as it may be, it is essential to cut all forms of communication during the break except in emergency situations.

The essence of relationship breaks is to get one’s head out of the space of the relationship to be able to make decisions as regards the future of the relationship. This essence will be lost if ground rules such as severing communication are not maintained.

Establish a timeline

Establishing a timeline for the break is another essential ground rule. Any intervention or correction method typically has a timeline as should be the case for breaks in relationships. That way both parties know that they have a specific amount of time to stay away from the relationship and consider the next step in the relationship. The timeline should also be mutually agreed on by both parties.

Without rules such as the ones stated above, relationship breaks are not effective. If a couple is going on a break, it is important to make the break count, and that’s what these rules ensure.

Author: Rac

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