If a guy is shy, getting him to break out of his shell and take your relationship to the next level may be a really tall order. The mere fact that you like him a lot or that he feels the same way won’t exactly change a thing. Unless he gets a push from you or someone else, you’ll probably be left wondering for a very long time whether he’s even interested in being with you. If you don’t want to scare him away by being too forward or you’re just as shy as he is, you could try a more subtle approach and try to slowly nude him towards the light. So if you’re ready to get this ball rolling between you and Mr. Shy Guy, here are a couple of things you could try.
- Run into him by chance. If you’re a woman living in today’s world, chances are you know what strategic positioning is all about. If you don’t, it simply means putting yourself in the position to randomly “run into him” without making it obvious and creepy. Find out what he likes and where he likes to hang out and plan a trip to those places. Pick up an interest in the things that he’s interested in so that he feels like you have a lot of things in common.
- Keep talking to him. Shy people listen way more than they talk. So if you’re dealing with a shy guy, chances are you’ll have to do most of the talking. Start conversations with him, call him regularly and find out he is doing. By making him feel like you’re genuinely interested in him and how he’s doing, he may be encouraged to take the bold step and make a move.
- Control the conversation. The chances of a conversation with a shy guy going awry or ending quickly and awkwardly are definitely high. You need to ask him questions that would require him to open up more. While you listen, smile and nod and make it obvious that you’re following exactly what he’s saying. In between conversations, find instances to tell him something nice or to pay him compliments. All that you’re doing will make him feel comfortable enough around you to take a chance on you.
- Ask for his advice often. No matter how shy he is, he is still a guy. And one thing we know about guys is that they love they damsel in distress. If you’re trying to draw him out, you could try asking for his help or his advice on matters often. This way, you build the impression that you value his help and opinions and that’s why you keep asking for them.
- Don’t force things. I understand that you’re eager to get the ball rolling on this relationship. However, you should always have it at the back of your mind that there’s only so far that you go before you begin to come across as pushy. Don’t try to get too know him too quickly, don’t ask him too many questions at once, don’t bombard his phone with texts. Whatever it is that you’re doing to get his attention, don’t do it too much else you risk the chance of pushing him away.
If you try all of this and he’s still not forthcoming, then maybe he needs more time. Or worse, maybe he’s just not into you and that’s absolutely okay.