How to deal with a commitment-phobic man

How should a woman deal with a commitment-phobic man? We interviewed experts asking them this question, below are their answers.

Clinical Psychologist Gaby Balsells:

It is not the woman’s job to convince, trick or wait for that commitment-phobic man to change his mind. Quite the opposite, the most loving thing to do is to respect where he is now and the fact that he’s not ready for a relationship.

If the woman does not desire commitment then it is a match. If the woman desires a committed relationship, then this is not a good match.

If this man is not a match, then the faster the woman can gracefully end things and close the door on this connection, the faster she will be able to continue her dating journey to find someone who does align with where she is in life and the commitment she desires.

Delee D’Arcy, LPC, LMFT:

First, one should ask ‘What does commitment-phobic mean’ to you? Is it that he is not following your time line for the relationship? Is it that he is not yet ready for marriage and all that comes with that? When you ask him, what does he say are his concerns about moving forward? Can you respect his concerns if they do not match your wants for the relationship? If commitment is your need, you might need to move on. Would you commit to a relationship before you were ready?

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