How to deal with the silent treatment from your spouse

One of the commonest ways couples fight is when one of them gives the other person the silent treatment. Oftentimes, the silent treatment happens when a partner pressures the other with complaints or requests but is met with total silence. It can be extremely frustrating for the other partner, as it causes more harm than good. The situation is a tricky one, so knowing how to deal with is key. Here are some practical ways to tackle this issue.

Understand the Reason

Sometimes, a lot of people have challenges in expressing how they feel about certain issues, so they bottle up their feelings and stay on their own. If your spouse falls into this category of people, then it’s very likely that they’ll give you the silent treatment, especially when they feel they can’t match your communication level. As the other person, you need to understand the reasons why your spouse gives you the silent treatment. That is the only way you can move forward in your relationship. It becomes both of you against the problem, rather than both of you against each other.

Silent film actress Ruth Clifford
Silent film actress Ruth Clifford

Talk About It

Communication is important in any relationship, so after you must have understood the reason for the silent treatment, talk to your partner about it. You must tread carefully here and try not to make “passive-aggressive” statements but clear and genuine ones. Start off by telling your partner how much you love and care about them, after which you go straight to the point. Talk about how you feel whenever they give you the silent treatment, and how it is taking a toll on your relationship. Ensure you say all this in a loving, friendly but firm tone.

Apologize When Necessary

Another way to deal with the silent treatment issue is to apologize if you have truly said something hurtful or hateful to your partner. Admit when you are wrong and sincerely take time out to apologize. However, you should never apologize for something you didn’t do. Rather, try to be supportive by being empathetic. Understand the situation so as to close the gap that has come between you two, if not, the gap would keep getting wider.

Set New Rules

After you and your partner must have talked about it, you should set new rules for communication. A good way to start this is to calm down after having a quarrel. Rather than have your emotions get flooded with intense feelings, take time out to calm down. After that, you can come back and talk through the conflict. This would resolve the issues you have as quickly as possible.

Finally, you and your partner would need to figure out healthier ways to confront all the situations you will be faced with. As much as you might not find a solution immediately, it will be a learning curve for both of you. If the situation is managed in a proper and healthy manner, then it would be a thing of the past.

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