Dating Someone Obsessed With Social Media

• Constantly checking their phone for notifications and updates on social media platforms: They might have a Pavlovian response to the sound of a notification, like a dog drooling at the dinner bell. It’s as if they’re waiting for some kind of digital validation every few minutes.

• Frequently posting pictures, statuses, or stories about their daily activities on various social media platforms: You’ll never miss a single moment of their life because it will be plastered all over your feed. From breakfast selfies to bathroom mirror shots, get ready for an intimate look into everything they do!

• Spending a significant amount of time scrolling through feeds and engaging with posts from friends, celebrities, influencers, etc.: Forget quality time together; you’ll always come second to that endless scroll. Even when you’re right there next to them trying to have a meaningful conversation, they can’t resist the allure of cat videos and meme compilations.

• Prioritizing capturing the perfect photo or video for social media over fully experiencing moments together in real life: Oh no! Did someone say “candid moment”? Hold up while they find the best lighting angle and strike multiple poses just so they can capture that one Instagram-worthy shot. Don’t worry though; by the time they finish setting up their tripod and adjusting filters, the sunset will be long gone.

• Being overly concerned with the number of likes, comments, and followers they have on their social media profiles: Move aside self-esteem boosters like compliments or achievements – nothing compares to that dopamine rush from seeing those numbers go up! Brace yourself for discussions about engagement rates and follower growth strategies during pillow talk.

• Feeling anxious or upset if they don’t receive enough attention or validation through social media engagement: Prepare yourself for emotional roller coasters fueled by virtual approval ratings. If one post doesn’t hit double-digit likes within five minutes? Cue dramatic sighs accompanied by existential crises questioning their worthiness as a human being.

• Always wanting to share every aspect of your relationship online by tagging you in posts or uploading couple photos regularly: Congratulations, you’re about to become the star of their digital show! Get ready for countless relationship updates, complete with cheesy captions and #couplegoals hashtags. Privacy? What’s that?

• Showing signs of jealousy when seeing others receiving more attention or praise on social media than themselves: Watch out for green-eyed monsters lurking behind those filtered selfies. They might get a bit envious if someone else steals the spotlight with an epic vacation photo or viral video. Just remember to shower them with extra likes and comments during such times of crisis.

• Struggling to disconnect from technology during quality time together due to constant desire to be connected online: “Hold on babe, just one sec!” will become their catchphrase as they struggle between giving you undivided attention and refreshing their feeds every few minutes. Quality time now comes served with Wi-Fi connectivity issues!

• Frequently interrupting conversations or activities to check social media notifications: Mid-conversation epiphanies are so passé; it’s all about mid-sentence phone checks now! Be prepared for sudden pauses while they respond urgently (or not-so-urgently) to messages, leaving you hanging like an unfinished tweet.

• Constantly seeking validation and reassurance through likes, comments, and shares on their posts: Their self-worth is directly linked to virtual applause meters. Prepare yourself for daily affirmations like “Did I look fat in that selfie?” or “Why didn’t anyone comment on my new haircut? Am I hideous?”

• Prioritizing virtual connections over building meaningful relationships in real life: You’ll feel like competing against thousands of followers vying for their attention – except none of these people have made dinner reservations at fancy restaurants under fake names just because they know how much they love avocado toast!

• Spending excessive amounts of money on gadgets, filters, or editing apps to enhance their social media presence: Forget about saving up for that dream vacation together; they’d rather invest in the latest smartphone with a better camera and download every photo-editing app known to humankind. Who needs financial stability when you can have flawless skin tones?

• Feeling a sense of competition with others based on the number of followers or engagement they receive online: It’s like being caught in an intense popularity contest where your partner is constantly comparing themselves to other influencers and fretting over who has more likes per post. Welcome to the Hunger Games of vanity metrics!

• Being overly concerned about curating an ideal image online rather than embracing authenticity in the relationship: You’ll witness firsthand how relationships are filtered just as much as photos these days. Get ready for meticulously crafted captions and carefully selected couple pictures that make it seem like everything is sunshine and rainbows 24/7 – even if you had an argument five minutes ago.

• Struggling with trust issues due to comparing your relationship with seemingly perfect ones portrayed on social media: Thanks to Instagram’s highlight reels, your significant other might start questioning why you don’t surprise them with extravagant gifts every week or whisk them away on private jets regularly. Remember folks, real life rarely comes equipped with Valencia filters.

• Having difficulty focusing during dates or outings as they are preoccupied with capturing content for social media purposes: Romantic candlelit dinners will turn into mini-photoshoots complete with multiple angles, food styling techniques, and strategic boomerangs. Enjoy those lukewarm meals while trying not to blink too often because “the lighting was just right!”

Phew! That was quite a list bursting at its seams! Now go forth armed with this knowledge before diving headfirst into dating someone obsessed with social media… if you dare!

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